Psychological dominace and submission

Tone of voice, a certain tilt to the head or raising of the eyebrows, and I know something is serious. Usually we then discuss the situation, though there are times when he makes a decision very quickly. I have no fear about voicing objections, or filling in details he might not be aware of.

I don't need to be fought into submission (we are not into the physical dominance/submission activities), it was a decision made long ago about how we would live, something that at first we believed was right due to church teaching. Later we came to realize that it worked for us, not for everybody.

It worked for us, in a large part due to the same iron hand in a velvet glove quality you write about. I trust his judgement, his love and care of me. I have never been treated like a servant, ordered around for his pleasure(well, except in some private and fun type situations), while my own needs or desires were belittled or ignored. How could I respect a man that treated me like that?

Respect is a big part our relationship. We both respect each other. Also, thankfulness, that we found each other, that we learned how to live together without all the strife and heartache we've seen so many go through in their marriages.